My liver just broke up with me...
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Dick very happy bro
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize