Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
So squirting runs in the family.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
