...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
