She's JV to your varsity
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Randomize
