STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
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