You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
