Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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