Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
