My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize