i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I showed him my bush... on skype.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
