You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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