What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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