you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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