Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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