We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
NoShamevember. You game?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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