Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize