I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
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