I could have mohawked her pubes.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Randomize