I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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