Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
The adults are the big ones right?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
