Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I would ride that face into the sunset
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
