don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize