do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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