honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
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Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Randomize