absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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