I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
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