Banned from zoo.
Again?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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