The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
