i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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