belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
