He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
