While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
