I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
