Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Just cropdusted the office
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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