Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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