before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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