I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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