everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
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