Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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