Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Randomize
