Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
