whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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