I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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