I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
