You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
My breasts were aching with rage.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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