I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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