my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize