is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
