I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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