this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
