I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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